Let's close East Broad Street for Halloween

Halloween is coming up in exactly two weeks. October 31st? You heard of this? Kids get dressed up and go house-to-house asking for sweets. Adults get less dressed up on balance, but more drunk. Everybody gets tired of listening to “Monster Mash” and performative debates on the merits of candy corn. It’s a whole thing.

As a resident of East Broad Street for the past couple Halloweens, it’s been a real treat (ahem) handing out KitKat bars and other, inferior types of candy to all the trick-or-treaters that descend on Church Hill’s main drag from around the East End. I’m looking forward to doing it again two Fridays from now. But I’m not looking forward to watching throngs of costumed kids high on sugar and holiday spirit navigate the sidewalks while cars and trucks drive up and down the street in the dark. Last year, I watched a full-size semi roll through! It’s scary stuff—and not in the spooky sense.

Here’s an idea: let’s close E. Broad St. for Halloween.

Why not? What’s the worst that could happen? If it’s less severe than “a driver runs over and kills a child,” that’s a good trade. Because a driver running over and killing a child could happen under the current status quo. Given how often jagoffs run stop signs and speed in this neighborhood, and how distracted children get when they’re fucked up on corn syrup and LARPing as their favorite Paw Patrol character¹ I’m surprised it hasn’t happened yet. I want to live in a neighborhood where chances of such ghastly horror are as close to zero as possible. Right now, they’re not. But if we closed E. Broad St. for Halloween? I like those odds a lot better.

Here’s what I’m thinking. On Halloween, we would place barriers on E. Broad St. between, say, N. 29th St. to N. 32nd St.—so, from Honey Baked Bee to The Mount Carmel Baptist Church, basically—as well as on the feeder cross-streets, to create a pedestrian zone. Not the whole day. Maybe 4-8pm, during prime trick-or-treating time? Car owners on these blocks would be encouraged to either park elsewhere (if they need to get somewhere) or keep their vehicle in place for the duration of the window; drivers trying to pass through Church Hill to points east or west would detour onto E. Marshall St.

Maybe we shorten the stretch of street, or lengthen the window of time. We’d probably need to collect some candy donations from around the neighborhood, too, so the houses in the pedestrian zone don’t immediately run out. I’m sure there would be other wrinkles to iron out. But I think know we could iron out said wrinkles! The overarching goal is giving kids more room to roam on Halloween without the specter of tragedy looming around every corner. Of E. Broad St. Which we should close.

Listen, everybody knows that when you want to accomplish something, you frame the conversation around children’s safety. And it’s true: I want to make Church Hill’s streets safer in general, not just on Halloween. But this really is about children’s safety! And adults’ safety, too, because we deserve to enjoy Halloween without the stress of maybe getting mowed down by a moving vehicle just as much as The Yoots. According to a 2018 study of 42 years’-worth of National Highway Traffic Safety Administration data, “[t]he relative risk of a pedestrian fatality was 43% higher on Halloween” than on random nights. Yes, of course, this is different than your absolute risk of getting vehicularly slaughtered on E. Broad St. this Halloween. But what I’m saying is we could drop that absolute risk to damn near nada. And we should.

Have you seen the fucking size of cars these days? Consumer Reports reported in 2024 that pick-up truck hood heights have increased 11% on average since 2000, while average weights grew 24% between 2000-2018. That’s based on factory-issue models, by the way, not the lift-kitted monstrosities you so often see ripping through the neighborhood. It’s not just pick-up trucks, either. Earlier this year, the US Department of Transportation released a study of six popular vehicles’ models over the past quarter century that indicated vehicles’ forward blind spots have gotten worse² in that period. It’s true, and good, that Richmond saw year-over-year declines in people incapacitated or killed in automotive incidents, per the city’s Vision Zero portal. But between the scofflaws, outdated road designs, and spotty sidewalks, I have yet to meet an East Ender who believes our streets are actually as safe as they could our should be. On Halloween, we can make at least one of them a lot safer: E. Broad St., by closing it.

Unfortunately, maybe not until next year, though. The Richmond Department of Parks and Recreation (DPR) handles special-eventings permitting on public property—which streets very much are, and don’t you forget it!—and requires requests to be filed at least 15 days in advance. That was yesterday. I thought about filing one myself, I really did. But after consulting with DPR’s website, and following up with city public information manager Tamara Jenkins, I realized it was going to take much more than some paperwork. Specifically: money. Quoting from Jenkins’ email here, “[t]he estimated expenses to be incurred by the organizer would come from:

• Depending on size of closure – a minimum of two RPD officers with RPD vehicle;

• Rental of road closure signs and barricades from vendor;

• Fee for deploying and removing the signs and barricades (to be waived if organizer deploys), and;

• Necessary insurance identified on the insurance certificate provided to the organizer.”

I don’t have costs on those line items. But I gather they total more than $0, which is The Lookout’s annual events budget. So unless one of youze already went through this process and have a Halloween surprise planned for us, E. Broad St. will remain open for regular auto traffic this year. Scary stuff.

Still, as they say, don’t mourn, organize. If we can’t get it done this year, there’s always next. Come Halloween 2026, E. Broad St. could be a car-free trick-or-treat paradise. Who’d say boo to that?

📜 Possum Poetry

Possum Poetry is original verse written exclusively for The Lookout by Penelope Poubelle, the Lookout’s litter critter-at-large. If you spot roadside trash you’d like her to immortalize in doggerel, email a photo to [email protected]. All submissions anonymous!

💸 Newbille finally speaks in the great property-tax debate

As expected, Richmond City Council voted earlier this week to maintain the city’s property-tax rate at $1.20 per $100 in assessed value. Throughout the great property-tax debate, your 7th District councilmember Cynthia Newbille, who currently serves as the body’s president, has been tight-lipped to the press (including The Lookout) on the reasons for her dogged opposition to lowering the rate. But at the October 14th meeting, The Richmonder finally got a quote from the rep worth running:

Here’s (a bit) more from VPM:

Alright, maybe “worth running” is a bit of a stretch. But hey—it’s something! Albeit not really a response to substantive criticism from other councilmembers that the city wasn’t “living within its means,” or how/if the $31 million in uncollected property taxes factored into her vote.

📢 Happenings on The Hill

• Fall in: At Franklin Military Academy’s Fall Festival tomorrow (10/18) from 9am-1pm for food, face-painting, and so forth. Flyer has more.

• Party on: Union Market’s annual block party is tomorrow from 11am-9pm, with music, specials, and more. Here’s the lineup.

• Celebrate a grand opening: Welcome Run Hair Salon to E. Leigh St. tomorrow from 2-5pm for tarot readings, permanent jewelry, and more. More info.

• Enjoy Rocktober: The Bellwether Sessions are back on E. Clay St. tomorrow at 7pm. Here’s the lineup, and here’s more on the series.

• Garden the garden: The Chimborazo Playground Community Garden is holding a work day on Sunday (10/19) to repair beds and improve the path. Details here.

• Sip it real good: Second Bottle is hosting an evening of Piedmont wines and snacks from 8 ½ (including focaccia!) next Thursday (10/23) from 8-10pm. Snag your ticket.

• Contribute a costume: Donate your extra disguises to Oakwood Arts’ 9th-annual drive now through next Friday (10/23) by dropping it off at 3511 P. St., to be given away at Robinson Theater the following Monday (10/26.) Flyer here.

Happenings on The Hill is a digital bulletin board for events, causes, and other items of interest to East Enders that don’t necessarily merit full editorial treatment. Got something for a future edition? Email the relevant details, links, etc. to [email protected] for consideration!

📸 A Very CHill Photo

Want to share your Very CHill Photo from the neighborhood? Email it to [email protected] with your name as you’d like it to appear for publication, and the camera you shot it on.

1  Is Paw Patrol still popular these days? I don’t know what the hot new children’s programming is. Please forgive me if I’ve offended any hardcore CoComelon heads out there.

2  In the worst case, the Honda CR-V, we’re talking like “68% down to 28%” worse.